so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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