have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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