Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
