We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
