you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
