There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize