whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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