But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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