...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
50% drunk capacity currently
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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