16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
