doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
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