one two three fourrrrnication!
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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