Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
