did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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