She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
