I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I just want to make out with him forever
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
