It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
