It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I had to cum in my sink.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
