Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
