How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
