If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
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