god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
His hands were made for my vagina.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
