im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize