She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
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