If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
