He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
