She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
