All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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