??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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