Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
