life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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