If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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