Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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