O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
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