Dual....:-)
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
