the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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