There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
