Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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