my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
