It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Randomize