I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
