White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
