On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
