Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Watching her eat just hurts me
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
