Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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