some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
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