i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
