I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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