the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
