Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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