Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize